PERSONAL SPECIAL ....Most People Aren’t Self-Confident — So Don’t Do What Most People Do!

Most People Aren’t Self-Confident — So Don’t Do What Most People Do!

“When they zig, you should zag, and you’ll win every time.” -Ramit Sethi, NYT Best-Selling author and entrepreneur

Most people aren’t full of confidence or self-belief.

Quite the opposite, in fact. Most people are insanely insecure. They are heavily preoccupied in what others think of them. They act to please others, and their primary motivations are “keeping up” and “looking cool.”

Whenever I fall into the rhythms that are common or “popular,” I start to feel that fear and anxiety again. Things like:

·         I need to keep up an image on social media

·         I need to make sure I have a cool-enough answer at my high school reunion for, “So what have you been up to?”

·         I need a better haircut so people will admire me fondly

It’s all a game. None of it matters. It only leaves you feeling more insecure.

So if most people are insecure, scared, anxious, and fragile…

Don’t do what other people do!

“If you keep living like the way you are now, you will continue to produce the same life you already have,” wrote prolific motivational speaker Jim Rohn. If you want a different life, you need to do things differently.

If you want to eliminate your anxiety and fear, then don’t look for answers from what author Hal Elrod calls the “Mediocre Majority.” They’re just as lost as you are, even if they’re great at pretending they aren’t.

When most people zig one way, you should zag the other way.

Choose your role models carefully. Those with the loudest voices rarely offer the wisest insights. In my years in 12-step programs for recovery, getting a “sponsor” (a guide for the difficult path ahead) is crucial. The best advice given to me about choosing a sponsor was to just find someone who has what you want.

Do you want the same insecure, boisterous, superficial life most people have? Or do you want the real thing, full of quiet self-confidence and an inner pride?

Then find someone who has what you want, and ignore the rest.

What Doesn’t Add to Your Healing Subtracts From It

“If your lifestyle does not add to your healing, it will subtract from it.” -Benjamin Foley

Is your lifestyle full of positive, supportive, healing influences?

Or is it full of garbage that drags you down and prevents you from growing?

Most people have several negative influences in their life that are dragging them down. “All around you is an environment that is trying to pull you down to Second-Class Street,” author David Schwartz once said.

These influences — environment, people, media, behaviors — prevent you from evolving into better versions of yourself. It’s your responsibility to cut them from your life.

If it’s not helping you, it’s likely hurting you.

“You cannot hang around negative people and expect a positive result.” -Darren Hardy

Strangely, most people try to fill their life with all sorts of “things” to remove the fear. But for the most part, more things means more anxiety. It’s more upkeep, more debt, and more things draining your attention.

As my friend Niklas Goeke once wrote, “minimalism will not make you happier.” But less stuff is almost always better.

I gave away most of my clothes. I don’t buy “trinkets” or “doo-dads,” things that have no real value. Prolific blogger James Altucher claims he only owns “15 things,” ensuring his mind is focuses and unencumbered.

“I wonder what it is that the more we have, the more we become prisoners at the thought of losing it, rather than setting us free.” -Nirmalya Kumar

In Conclusion

Most people struggle with big levels of anxiety and fear. It’s uncommon to see high levels of self-confidence; people notice the person who is secure and comfortable in their own skin.

You can be that person. Even if you’re not there yet, start by modeling your behaviors around people who already have what you want.

Act while you still feel the fear; it’s not going away, so act anyway. Trust me — you’ll feel better after.

Seek problems out. Start proving to yourself you can handle problems and you won’t back down.

Remember — most people are full of tremendous anxiety and self-doubt; don’t do what most people do!

If you want to activate extreme self-confidence and eliminate anxiety and fear, then start living a new life with new behaviors that will make that possible.

Anthony Moore

https://medium.com/the-mission/how-to-activate-extreme-self-confidence-and-destroy-chronic-anxiety-and-fear-d8c678b16010