10 Characteristics of People With High Emotional Intelligence
Do you wonder why certain people are
more successful than others? The answer often lies in emotional intelligence,
or EQ.
What is it about how certain people behave and interact, how
they are "wired" that drives them to greater success than their
peers?
More often than not, it is their emotional intelligence (EQ),
or, in other words, their ability to identify and manage the emotions of
themselves and others.
There are critical ways that high achievers with strong
emotional intelligence handle their lives, which you can learn from. Ten of
them are:
1. Embrace Work-Life Balance
People who work too hard without rest or focusing equally on
personal relationships usually burn out before they can reach their potential.
Conversely, those who don't work particularly hard tend to simply underachieve.
The first step in EQ is self-awareness: understanding how much work--and focus
on work--you can take on in your life and pushing the upper limit of that
without coming too close to going over.
2. Empower Your Partner
Finding the right partner is a critical part of achieving
emotional balance. That person should stabilize, compliment, and empower
you--and they can only do that if you empower them in turn. Successful partner
EQ support relationships are symbiotic--and it starts with you.
3. Focus
I always try to draw a key distinction in my own life between
multitasking and multifocusing. Although I may be doing three tasks at once at
any given moment, I keep my overall goals very focused and don't change them
until those goals are achieved, or I need to pivot them.
4. Be Creative
Boredom hampers creativity, which in turn hampers emotional
welfare. Emotional creativity manifests itself most effectively in a desire to
understand and explore other people positively. Individuals who are genuinely
and positively curious about others tend to form powerful and enduring
relationships.
5. Listen First
Listening is often empowered by emotional creativity mixed with
discipline. It is a sign of great emotional intelligence--and not one that all
of us, myself included, have any easy time with--to be genuinely curious about
people and disciplined enough to remove the focus from oneself and
listen to them 75 percent of the time.
6. Embrace Dynamism and Positive Volatility
Too much safety leads to boredom, which over time stunts
intellectual stimulation and often leads to insecurity, which typically hampers
emotional intelligence. Change, especially when embraced as a positive, can be
a powerful catalyst.
7. Don't Be a Perfectionist
Perfectionism, nearly always unfulfilled, leads to intense
frustration and emotional distress. It also leads to placing blame on others
for failing to live up to unacceptable standards, which is a major drag on EQ
and on your relationships with others.
8. Don't Accept the First Answer
Use curiosity and listening to gently probe for many solutions
to different problems. EQ is one of the best ways to identify multi-layered
solutions and incorporate the ideas of multiple participants seamlessly.
9. Move Past Mistakes
Dwelling on the past, and on the mistakes of either yourself or
others, causes distress, anger, and misplaced blame.
10. Channel Anger
Anger is not a negative emotion in itself--it is the most
powerful catalyst in the human arsenal. But it must be controlled and channeled
into the appropriate action--and away from people. EQ helps people use anger
the right way.
BY PAUL
GROSSINGER
http://www.inc.com/paul-grossinger/10-characteristics-of-people-with-high-emotional-intelligence.html?cid=em01016week13a
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