BOOK SUMMARY 104 Triggers
·
Summary written by: Peter Nakamura
"This is a book about adult behavior change. Why are
we so bad at it? How do we get better at it? … To answer these questions, I’ll
be focusing on the triggers on our environment. Their impact is profound."
- Triggers, page xv
Marshall
Goldsmith has worked with some of the most influential CEOs of our time and
coached them on making behavioral changes in their personal and professional
lives. In his book Triggers, he examines how environmental triggers
can derail us and shares strategies on how we can overcome those triggers to
become the best versions of ourselves.
If
you’ve been looking to make a change in your life and found yourself getting
stuck, this is a book for you. Behavior change is quite possibly the most
difficult challenge that we come across in our lives. We’re battling ingrained
habits and environmental queues, and having the right tools at
the right time is paramount to your success. Read on to find
out what some of those tools are and start implementing them into your life
today.
The Golden Egg
It’s The Environment
"If
there is one 'disease' that I’m trying to cure in this book, it revolves around
our total misapprehension of our environment."- Triggers, page 26
A good
friend of mine, Matt Tod, uses the phrase, “Awareness creates choice. Choice
creates change” and I always thought that it was such a great way to describe
how we go about making changes in our lives. It all starts with awareness of
our surroundings and of ourselves.
But
awareness is not enough when we’re dealing with something as complex as our
environment. If you’ve ever come home from a long day of work or school where
you were highly focused and engaged, but the moment you step through the doors
you become a tired (or worse) irritated family member or partner, you know what
I mean. You may be aware of your behavior change but you might not have the
tools or skills to deal with this shift.
Goldsmith
suggests looking at our environment “as if it were a person – as imminent and
real as an archrival sitting across the table.” When we look at our environment
as a real person the challenge becomes more dynamic and situational. Sometimes
our environment can present us with very positive triggers (e.g. our boss
commending our work) or negative (e.g. a snarky remark from a colleague) but
what really matters is our reaction to them. Once we understand the power the
environment has over us, we can then begin to make the necessary adjustments to
overcome the negative triggers.
Gem #1
Six Daily Self-Questions
"That’s
the secret power of daily self-questioning. If we fall short on our goals
eventually we either abandon the questions or push ourselves into action."- Triggers, page 123
One of
Goldsmith’s key takeaways in the book is implementing what he calls the “Daily
Questions”. It’s a series of questions you ask yourself at the end of the day
to see how well you did with each one. You then give yourself a score between 1
and 10 for each. For any of you that have tracked your habit changes in the
past like tracking your workouts or monitoring your calorie intake, this’ll
probably sound familiar.
Where
Goldsmith strikes gold is in how you ask the questions to
yourself. Instead of asking yourself “Did you exercise today?” he recommends
starting the question with “Did you do your best?” When you start the question
with “Did you do your best?” it puts the onus on the effort that
you put into achieving that goal. Sometimes we don’t meet our daily goals but
at least we can try our best to achieve them.
This
was a huge insight for me. I’ve tracked myself in the past to measure my habits
and productivity but I could never really sustain it. I often got demotivated
after a couple of days of lackluster results. The Daily Questions is a new
weapon in my arsenal and I’m excited to give the six fundamental questions he
provides in the book a shot. I’ve been recording my scores over the last couple
of weeks and the process has been much more tangible and rewarding so far.
Here
are the six questions to ask yourself daily:
·
Did I do my best to set
clear goals today?
·
Did I do my best to make
progress toward my goals today?
·
Did I do my best to find
meaning today?
·
Did I do my best to be
happy today?
·
Did I do my best to build
positive relationships today?
·
Did I do my best to be
fully engaged today?
Gem #2
AIWATT
"AIWATT
is the delaying mechanism we should be deploying in the interval between
trigger and behavior – after a trigger creates an impulse and before behavior
we may regret."- Triggers, page 158
AIWATT
stands for the following:
Am I
willing,
at this time,
to make the investment required
to make a positive difference
on this topic?
at this time,
to make the investment required
to make a positive difference
on this topic?
Goldsmith
suggests that every time you get triggered by your environment, you go through
the AIWATT. Am I willing makes your response to the trigger a
choice and not a reaction. At this time makes you think
whether now is the appropriate time to respond to the trigger or should you
wait until later. To make the investment required reminds us
that responding to a trigger takes energy and allows us to ask ourselves
whether the response is worth our time. To make a positive difference places
the emphasis on the gentler side of who we are and how we can make the
situation better. And finally, On this topic asks us whether
the matter at hand is something we actually can make a positive difference on –
sometimes we just can’t make a positive difference.
For
me, it’s an interesting idea and I know it’s going to be a bit of a challenge
to remember the phrase every time I get triggered. But hey, it’s better than
being overwhelmed by a trigger or not having a response at all. Whether it be a
debate with a colleague or an irritating conversation with a family member, I
can practice implementing AIWATT to ensure I can react in the best way possible
to my triggers.
So how
does your environment impact you at the moment? Does it serve you or does it
prevent you from becoming the person you want to be?
Triggers gave me some practical tools to apply to my life
immediately and like any good habit, it’s going to take some time to implement
and find consistency with. But starting with a proven system that has worked
for some of the top leaders in the world seems like a great place to start!
No comments:
Post a Comment