17 Resolutions Only the Most
Successful People Make
Easy, rewarding, fulfilling. What's not to love?
New Year's resolutions: Most of us make them;
most of us fail to keep them.
Why do we fail? Usually, we resolve to do
something so big, so difficult, so time-consuming--we reach so high, the simple
act of reaching gets tiresome. And so we quit.
Fortunately, there's a better way. Here are
17 simple things to do sometime in 2016. They're all one-time events (although
you can certainly repeat them as many times as you like). And each is a lot
easier to accomplish than some
hopefully-life-changing-but-in-the-end-never-accomplished New Year's
resolution.
See the following as a to-do list you can
check off as you go along:
1. Do
one thing you've been afraid to do.
The most paralyzing fear is fear of the
unknown. (At least it is for me.)
Nothing ever turns out to be as hard or as
scary as you think.
Plus,
it's incredibly exciting to overcome a fear. You'll get that "Oh, my gosh,
I can't believe I just did that!" rush. That's an amazing feeling you
probably haven't experienced for a long time.
2.
Apologize for one thing you need to apologize for.
People make mistakes. So we blame them for
our problems.
But we are almost always to blame too.
Maybe we didn't provide enough training. Maybe we didn't foresee a potential
problem. Maybe we asked too much, too soon. We did or did not do something we
could have.
Take responsibility instead: not in a
masochistic, woe-is-me way, but in an empowering way. Take responsibility, and
then focus on being smarter or better or faster or more creative next time.
3.
Start one thing you've always planned to start.
You have plans. You have goals. You have
ideas.
Who
cares? You have nothing until you actually do something.
Every day, we let hesitation and uncertainty
stop us from acting on our ideas. Fear of the unknown and fear of failure often
stops me and may be what stops you, too.
Pick
one plan, one goal, or one idea. And get started. Do something. Do anything. Just
take one small step.
The first step is by far the hardest. Every
successive step will be a lot easier.
4.
Tell one person how awesome he or she is.
No one receives enough praise. No one. Pick
someone who did something well and tell her or him.
And feel free to go back in time.
Saying, "I was just thinking about how you handled that project last
year" can make just as positive an impact today as it would have then.
Maybe a little more impact, because you still remember what happened a year
later.
Surprise praise is a gift that costs the
giver nothing but is priceless to the recipient.
5.
Prove one person wrong.
I'm ashamed to admit it, but one of the best
ways to motivate me is to insult me--or for me to manufacture a way to feel
insulted, regardless of whether I'm justified in feeling that way or not.
See, whether I'm justified in feeling
slighted or angry is not the point. I use rejection to fuel my motivation to do
whatever it takes to prove that person wrong and, more important, achieve what
I want to achieve.
Call it manufactured anger. Call it
artificial competition. Call it, shoot, childish and immature. I don't care--it
works for me.
And it can work for you.
So don't turn the other mental cheek. Get
pissed off, even if your anger is unjustified and imaginary--in fact,
especially if your anger is unjustified or imaginary--because that will help
shake you out of your same thing, different day rut.
6. Ask
one person for help.
Asking someone for help instantly recognizes
the person's skills and values and conveys your respect and admiration.
That's reason enough to ask someone to help
you. The fact you will get the help you need is icing on the achievement cake.
7.
Offer to help one person.
Then flip it around. Many people see asking
for help as a sign of weakness, so they hesitate. Yet we can all use help.
But don't just say, "Is there anything I
can help you with?" Most people will automatically say, "No, I'm all
right."
Be
specific. Say, "I've got a few minutes; can I help you finish that?"
Offer in a way that feels collaborative, not patronizing or gratuitous.
And then actually help. You'll make a real
difference in someone's life--and you'll take a solid step toward creating
a connection with that person.
8. Do
one thing no one else is willing to do.
Pick one thing other people aren't willing to
do. Pick something simple. Pick something small. Whatever it is, do it.
Instantly, you're a little different from the
rest of the pack.
Then keep going. Every day, do one thing no
one else is willing to do. After a week, you'll be uncommon. After a month,
you'll be special.
After a year, you'll be incredible, and you
won't be like anyone else.
You'll
be you.
9.
Just once, refuse to care what other people think.
Most of the time, you should worry about what
other people think--but not if it stands in the way of living the life you
really want to live.
If you really want to start a
business but you're worried that people might think you're crazy, F 'em.
If you really want to change careers but you're afraid of what people might
think, F 'em. If you really want to start working out but you're afraid people
at the gym will think you're fat or out of shape, F 'em.
Pick one thing you haven't tried simply
because you're worried about what other people think--and just go do it.
It's your life. Live it. F 'em.
10.
Tell one person yes.
You're busy. Your plate is full. There are
plenty of reasons to sit tight, stay safe, keep things as they are. But that
also means tomorrow will be just like today.
Say yes to something different. Say yes to
something scary. Say yes to the opportunity you're most afraid of.
When you say yes, you're really saying,
"I trust myself."
Trust yourself.
11.
Tell one person no.
Still, you can't do everything. You can't
help everyone. You may want to, but you can't.
Sometimes you just need to say no: to a
favor, to a request, to a family member. Sometimes you really need to be
able to focus on what is important to you.
Say no at least once before the end of the
month--the harder to say, the better.
And
don't worry if you feel selfish: When your heart is in the right place, what
you accomplish by spending more time on your goals will eventually benefit other people, too.
12.
"Fire" one person.
Maybe there's an employee you really need to
let go but haven't. Or maybe there's a customer, or a vendor, or even just a
friend.
Sometimes the best addition starts with
subtraction. Pick someone who is dragging you down or holding you back, and let
them go.
13.
One time, just let it fly.
Yeah, you only get one chance to make a first
impression. Yeah, perfection is the only acceptable outcome.
Unfortunately, no product or service is ever
perfect, and no project or initiative is perfectly planned.
Work hard, do great work, and let it fly.
Your customers will tell you what needs to be improved--which means you'll get
to make improvements that actually matter.
You can't find out until you let go.
You can't really do anything until you let
go.
14. Do
one thing that's not your job.
Job descriptions are fine until they get in
the way of getting things done.
No matter what your role or what you've
accomplished, you're never too good to roll up your sleeves, get dirty, and do
a little grunt work. No job is ever too menial, no task too unskilled or
boring.
The next time you see something that needs to
be done, do it.
15.
Embrace one thing another person does.
Sure, we're all
individuals. (OK, I'm not.) We should set our own
courses and follow our own paths--most of the time.
Sometimes,
the best thing to do is copy what made someone else successful. Pick someone
who has accomplished what you would like to accomplish, and followthat path.
One time, don't try to reinvent a perfectly
good wheel.
16. Do
something foolish.
Sometimes the dumbest things result in our
fondest memories: the time you and two employees stayed up all night loading
trucks and listening to every Zeppelin album in order; the time you and another
employee drove all night so you could arrive at the customer's warehouse first
thing the next morning to sort defective product; the time you and a crew
stayed in the plant all weekend during a snowstorm, sleeping on cots and eating
vending machine food and cranking out orders ...
Each happened more than 20 years ago,
but my memories are vivid.
Do something seemingly stupid or outrageous
or crazy--the harder, the better. You probably won't love it while it's
happening, but the result will be doing something cool and creating a memory
that will always make you smile.
17.
Call your parents.
Your parents love you. They want the best for
you. They will always be there for you.
They won't be around forever. Call them.
So
here's your list:
1. Do
one thing you're afraid to do.
2.
Apologize for one thing you need to apologize for.
3.
Start one thing you've always planned to start.
4.
Tell one person how awesome they are.
5.
Prove one person wrong.
6. Ask
one person for help.
7.
Offer to help one person.
8. Do
one thing no one else is willing to do.
9.
Just once, refuse to care what other people think.
10.
Tell one person yes.
11.
Tell one person no.
12.
"Fire" one person.
13.
One time, just let it fly.
14. Do
one thing that's not your job.
15.
Embrace one thing another person does.
16. Do
something foolish.
17.
Call your parents.
BY JEFF HADEN
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