11 Body Language Essentials for Your Next Negotiation
If you aren't in control of your
body language, it doesn't matter how much you've prepared for a negotiation.
Here are some top tips.
Mirroring is when one person adopts
another person's body language, vocal tone, and behavior, which builds rapport.
For example, if the prospect is engaged, he or she will lean forward and follow
your movements. If that's not the case and the person is leaning far back and
crossing his or her arms, be sure to find a way to bring the person back in and
ask what isn't right.-
2. Nod Your Head
I adopted a negotiation trick from
President Obama after observing the following: Even when he's in the middle of
a disagreement or being harshly criticized, he nods his head and maintains eye
contact. I found that doing the same in negotiations defuses tension and builds
alignment, even during contentious conversations.
3. Pay Attention to Your
Hands
When people are nervous or stressed,
it often shows in their hands. When you're negotiating, make sure your hands
project confidence and poise. Fidgeting or clasping your hands tightly together
reveals that you're nervous. The other party can take advantage of that. Try putting
your hands just below your chest and put your fingers together when you want to
confidently make a point.
4. Plant Your Feet
Your face, head, and hands are
obvious body parts to control when negotiating. But your feet? Not so much.
Keep them firmly planted on the ground to show your resolve. It also ensures
that you avoid coming off as ambivalent or stubborn. This helps you stay
confident, too.
5. Relax Your Body
Negotiations can be intense, so
assume a relaxed body position to help ease the tension. Complement that body
language with soft-spoken or non-aggressive commentary. This can help build
trust and lead to more effective negotiations.
6. Remember to Smile
It's important that the environment
doesn't get too intense. For the deal to be successful, it will most likely be
a long-lasting relationship, and that can't happen if it's not friendly between
both sides.
7. Keep an Open Posture
Keep
yourself pleasant and appealing. Lean in and act engaged, and keep your stance
open. People want to feel like the deal is about (or at least includes) them,
even if it's not in their best interest. So they may not get exactly what they
want, but they do want to know that you're interested in their thoughts or
feelings about a topic in the negotiation. Otherwise, they shut down.
8. Hide Your Nerves
Do not fidget during a negotiation.
Any signs of being nervous or anxious can be a red flag. Don't bounce your
legs, tap your feet, or touch your face. You want to appear calm and confident
to the person with whom you are negotiating.
9. Keep a Poker Face
A good poker face is essential. I
once heard someone say, "Don't negotiate like you're Tony Soprano unless
you have a gun in your hand." That's true. People think they have to talk
like Gordon Gekko in a negotiation. The best do their homework, come with
really strong data and facts, and don't show their hand.
10. Show Your Patience
When negotiating, pretend that you
are sitting with your grandmother. You need to focus because she might speak
softly, and you certainly need to be patient explaining things because topics
that are obvious to you (Facebook and mobile apps) may be foreign to her. Make
sure to smile a lot, too. And focus on your partner; be empathetic to his
needs.
11. Hold Eye Contact
Although there are other body
language factors that can detract from your negotiation skills, faltering eye
contact is the most detrimental. The saying that eyes are the windows to the
soul also applies to effective communication. Not maintaining eye contact gives
off a perception of uneasiness, as well as a lack of confidence and
conviction--characteristics that no strong negotiator embodies.
http://www.inc.com/11-body-language-essentials-for-your-next-negotiation.html
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