7 Beliefs That Will Help When You Get
Stuck
Being
stuck sucks.
There’s
that part of you that wants to get moving, wants to make something amazing
happen and doesn’t want to waste any more time, but there’s that other part of
you that doesn’t know where to start, doesn’t feel enthused about the options
and sometimes feels powerless to change anything.
So, yeah,
it sucks.
The good
news is, your best weapon in the fight against being stuck is in that wonderful
brain of yours—your thinking and your beliefs.
So, here
are seven beliefs that will help you get unstuck.
1. I don’t need to have all the information
It’s good
to get your facts right before attempting to make a decision, but that can
often become an exercise in gathering together and pouring over all of the
information and details you can find, to the point where you contract a solid
case of analysis-paralysis-itis. (Yeah, that’s a thing).
You don’t
need all of
the information, and as there will always be unknowns in life, it’s unlikely
that it’s even possible to get all of it. Surrounding yourself with information
and details is really just swaddling yourself in a comfort blanket.
It’s much
better to know enough to make a choice and to let go of the rest.
2. I can trust my intuition
That quiet
little voice way down inside you is pretty darn smart. It knows what matters to
you. It knows who you are. It knows what you can do if you get behind a
decision. The trouble is, with all the pressure to succeed and get things
right, it’s easy to not hear it among the sound and fury of everything else.
But it
never goes away. Your intuition is there, right now. It’ll give you huge clues
about what’s next, and it will always try to tell you what you need to know.
All it
takes is the belief that you can trust your intuition; then you just need to
practice hearing it.
3. I’m more than my circumstances
When
you’re stuck, all you can see are the walls around you. Whichever way you turn,
you just can’t seem to find a way out or through, so you keep on butting up
against those walls, getting more and more frustrated, tired and disillusioned.
After a
while, it’s easy to start defining yourself by the circumstances you find
yourself in. You may think you’re small, stuck and not good enough.
The truth
is that you’re vastly capable, and have barely touched the ceiling of that
capability. You have strengths, talents and experiences that amount to
something. You have options, choices and the ability to make things happen. You
have potential and possibility in your fingertips. You’re way more than any
circumstances.
4. My next move doesn’t have to be “right”
The world
rams success down your throat and tells you that you’re less than if you’re not
successful. The pressure that creates to be successful and have your next
choice be the “right” one is immense, and you can endlessly pressure, doubt and
second-guess yourself in pursuit of what’s right.
But there
is no right way. If I can paraphrase Frank
Sinatra, there’s only your way. Pressuring
yourself to get it right will get you nowhere fast, so what if there was no
right or wrong answer?
How about
simply believing that whatever happens, you can always make a great choice?
5. I can gently explore what’s next for me
Decisions
are strange things. We sometimes in invest so much in them that we think
everything hinges on our next choice; that it’s make or break, flourish or
flounder, live or die.
The
stories you tell yourself about what’s next for you and the drama inherent in
those stories cast you as the protagonist struggling against the odds, and they
can feel compelling enough to keep you stuck for a very long time.
But things
don’t have to be full of drama and weight. Look at a choice with a sense of
playfulness rather than fear. Approach an opportunity with curiosity rather
than dread. Take that next step with light feet rather than dragging your
heels.
De-dramify
where you’re at and go play instead.
6. I don’t need to judge the process
Do you
blame yourself for being stuck? Do you beat yourself up for not being able to
move forward? Or perhaps you blame other people or circumstances for not giving
you what you need?
However
much you might resist it, life will always be full of twists and turns; those
ups and downs are part of the deal. Judging the swings and roundabouts of life
is like blaming a year for having a winter, so watch yourself when you’re
judging or blaming things for being how they are.
Embrace
the process, don’t beat on it.
7. Asking for help doesn’t make me “less than”
Ever felt
like you need to solve your problems by yourself? What about feeling like you
shouldn’t bother someone else with your “stuff”? Or, maybe you feel too ashamed
or embarrassed to ask for help?
When
you’re stuck, it feels as though it’s just you, doesn’t it? You see other
people going about their lives, getting things done and having fun doing it, so
you might think that nobody else gets stuck like you. But they do. You just
don’t see what’s happening in their heads or hearts.
Asking for
help and support doesn’t make you weak any more than having a bowl of pasta
makes you Italian. It’s sometimes the bravest and wisest thing you can do, and
we’re all stronger and better when we’re connected. You don’t have to do this
alone.
The bottom
line?
You’re
only as stuck as you let yourself believe you are. There are always options and
there are always choices. What counts then, are the beliefs you hold about what
you do—or don’t do—next.
Steve Errey
http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/7-beliefs-that-will-help-when-you-get-stuck.html?ref=mail&mtype=daily_newsletter&mid=20170224_customized_editor_pick&uid=687414&hash=707e797f7e757e6d794c856d747b7b3a6f7b79&action=click
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