7 Ways
Emotional Intelligence Can Help You Handle Year-End Stress
The holiday season
may be all about selflessness, but a little self-awareness still goes a long
way.
It's no secret that the
holiday season can be pretty stressful. Health experts at the Mayo Clinic note
that the stretch between Thanksgiving and New Year's tends to find people's
usual stress levels spiking. But what's less widely understood is that highly
emotionally intelligent people may have some more coping tools than others.
In one study by Athens University of Economics and
Business researchers, at the University of Greece, higher levels of emotional
intelligence were linked with with lower levels of work-related stress. And
there's little reason to believe that those same skills can't come in handy for
dealing with seasonal pressures, too. Here's a look at some of the ways
emotional intelligence can help.
People with higher levels of emotional intelligence are more aware
of their feelings, what causes them, and why. This awareness helps them recognize
stressors earlier and come up with techniques for coping with them.
People with higher levels
of emotional intelligence are more aware of their feelings, what causes them,
and why.
Self-awareness can be cultivated, though. If you're feeling stressed,
take a moment to think about which situations tend to bring out your strongest
negative emotions. Simply recognizing that can help you prepare coping
mechanisms ahead of time, preventing those feelings from totally commandeering
your rational thought.
Knowing how they react to stress gives highly emotionally
intelligent people advance warning that something is wrong before they get
overwhelmed.
The higher our emotional intelligence, the more we're tuned into
others' emotional states—not just our own. This makes it less likely that we'll
take signs of other people's stress personally. People with high emotional
intelligence can put things into perspective and avoid getting caught up in a
stressful situation they have no control over.
Practicing a little more awareness is a powerful thing. And trying
to understand what may be causing stress in others can help you have a little
more empathy, too—at a time of year when that's extra important.
When we feel threatened or verbally attacked, our initial reaction
is usually to lash out at the source. But not giving in to that initial impulse
is the first step toward defusing the situation. It's easy to merely react.
It's a lot harder to think about the problem first and then respond
thoughtfully. Instead of just getting stuck and stressing ourselves out even
more, emotionally intelligence helps you press pause long enough to consider
some solutions.
Everyone has a need to be understood. Some of the worst clashes
during the holiday season simply result from people feeling that they aren't
being heard. It's one thing to disagree, but it's essential that everyone be
listened to.
This is true all year round, but the hectic, distracting
atmosphere of the holidays makes deep listening harder than usual. People with
higher emotional intelligence know it's worth putting the extra time and effort
into trying to understand others' feelings, worries, and frustrations—knowing it'll
help reduce their own.
In fact, the ability to
accurately identify and express what we're feeling helps us to cope better. For
example, just by saying you're feeling frustrated helps you
settle those feelings and move ahead—it goes hand in hand with self-awareness.
You need to be able to identify your feelings before you can make choices about
how they'll deal with them. And that can take some precision. Being able to
distinguish one negative emotion from another is more useful than you might
think.
Emotional intelligence increases our ability to see situations
from more than one point of view. The end of the year tends to push us into
contact with more people than usual—family members, friends of friends,
colleagues, and so on. All that extra socializing and interaction can be
exhausting. And the stress it causes can lead to conflict.
If stress shortens
everyone's fuse, emotional intelligence blows out the match that's about to
light it.
But emotionally intelligent people know that while they may not
agree with someone, they can still try and see things from their perspective.
This allows them to step back from judgment and avoid getting drawn into a
dispute. If stress shortens everyone's fuse, emotional intelligence blows out
the match that's about to light it.
When you're feeling an unusual amount of stress, it's always
important to reach out for support. Highly emotionally intelligent people are
aware of their limitations; they know when they can manage and when they need
help. But even when the stress is too much, they have no problem reaching out
to others.
The holiday season may emphasize selflessness and community, but
there's nothing selfish about admitting when you're struggling. You need to
know when it's time to draw on your support network or even get professional
help. This time of year is supposed to be joyful, but the reality for many of
us is different—and that's okay. Simply recognizing when there's an added load
of stress on your shoulders is a sure sign of emotional intelligence to begin
with, and a great first step toward lightening it.
HARVEY
DEUTSCHENDORF
https://www.fastcompany.com/3066487/7-ways-emotional-intelligence-can-help-you-handle-year-end-stress?utm_source=mailchimp&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=fast-company-daily-newsletter&position=4&partner=newsletter&campaign_date=12262016
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