PERSONAL
SPECIAL Perfecting the first impression
Five ways to make people like
you in four seconds or less
Within seconds of meeting
you, people make judg ments about your personality.
Are you hireable? Or
dateable? Or a potential friend? And while it's possible to reverse a bad first
impression, it's not easy. So you'll want to put your best face forward.
Author Nicholas Boothman's
book, How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less highlights a key
strategy for making a trusting connection with your conversation partner while
greeting them. And this process takes just four seconds.
Read on a few tips from the
book to find out how to become instantly likeable.
STEP 1 Be open
Boothman says you should
open both, your body and your attitude.
In terms of your body
language, you should aim your heart directly at the person you're meeting.
Don't cover your heart with your hands or your arms. And if you're wearing a
jacket, un button it beforehand.
It's equally impor tant to
cultivate a pos itive attitude. While you're greeting the person, you should
feel and be aware of that positivity.
STEP 2 Make eye contact
Initiate eye contact and
let your eyes re flect your positive at titude.
If you feel uncom fortable
making eye contact, Boothman suggests a strategy to getting used to it. He says
when you're watching television, note the eye colour of the people on camera
and say the name of the colour in your head. The next day, do the same thing with
every person you meet.
Just make sure to look away
at some point. According to one recent study, most people preferred eye contact
that lasted about three seconds. And no one in the study preferred eye contact
that lasted longer than nine seconds.
STEP 3 Beam
Be the first one to smile.
You'll send the message that you're sincere.
Research suggests that
smiling when you meet someone in a happy context is a useful way to get them to
remember you. But keep in mind: If you're employing this strategy in a job interview,
consider letting your smile fade after the initial meet-and-greet.
In one study, researchers
asked college students to role-play job interviews. They found that students
who played candidates for the position of newspaper reporter, manager, and re
search assistant were less likely to get the hypothetical job when they smiled.
STEP 4 Say `hello'
Whether you say “hi,“
“hey,“ or “hello,“ or use another salutation, you should sound delighted to be
making this person's acquaintance.
Next, extend your hand.
Make sure to give a firm handshake, which generally creates a more positive
impression.When the person you're meeting gives his or her name, try to repeat
it.
If you're meeting multiple
people and can't shake everyone's hand at once, Boothman says it's possible to
conduct a `hands-free' handshake. Do everything you'd normally do while shaking
someone's hand -point your heart in their direction, say hello, and smile but
don't extend your hand.
STEP 5 Lean in
Boothman suggests an “almost
imperceptible forward tilt“ to show that you're open to and interested in what
the person has to say
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