15
Signs Of Negative People
Lack of
confidence, gloom and doom, distrust, and anxiety are a toxic cocktail mix. You
probably wonder how one person can survive with all that inside them! Yet,
these negative people exist all around us and are impossible to avoid.
This is
not to say that you will never have moments of despair, anxiety and
discouragement. But as a positive person, you never let these thoughts
take over your life. You live the four-to-one ratio: You generate
four positive thoughts for every negative one, to keep
situations from getting out of hand.
Below,
you’ll find 15 signs of negative people, and see what makes them tick. You’ll
discover why many people are unaware of their negativity and how it is
ruining their lives – and everyone else’s. These warning signs will also
teach you to be on the alert so that you can avoid falling into the black
hole of negativity.
The 15
signs of negative people:
1. They always worry
Negative people
survive on worry – a very unhealthy diet. This mindset is geared
towards the need to feel protected and aware to an extreme degree.
Practising mindfulness and staying in the present are great ways to squash
worry.
“Whatever is going to happen
will happen, whether we worry or not.” – Anna Monnar
2. They try to tell you what to do
When
people start to tell you what you should do with your life, what house to buy
or whether you should change your job, you can be sure they are in the negative
squad. They do not realize it but this is a sure sign that they have not sorted
out their own life issues. It is much easier to tell everyone else how to live
their lives!
3. They live in the default position
There is a
neurological explanation as to why some people end up being so negative. It has
to do with the part of the brain called the amygdala, which functions as an alarm and
is constantly on the look out for danger, fear and bad news.
Scientists believe this to be the brain’s default position.
In evolutionary terms, this is understandable; it is all part of the
fear-flight mechanism in which the brain uses most of its neurons to keep
up with all the bad news that is stored in the memory.
Positive
people develop an ability to evaluate and face up to problems which can
counteract this mechanism.
4. They enjoy secrecy
If you
meet a negative person at a party, you may find the conversation rather
tedious. Fearful of revealing too much information about themselves, they live
in fear that doing so would be used against them in some way. They rarely think
that what they share could be used in a positive light.
If you
find yourself becoming defensive and closed during conversation, think
about possible reasons why.
5. They are pessimists
My mother
was the world’s greatest pessimist. Spotting menacing clouds on the way to the
beach, she would invariably say that the best of the day had gone.
Negative people rarely envisage a happy outcome or great result. They always
imagine that everything will go wrong.
6. They cannot limit their exposure to bad news
Negative
people love coming into your cubicle and saying things like, “Have you
heard the terrible news about….”, after which they fill you in on all the
gory details. The tragedy is that overexposure to negative news affects a
person more deeply than was previously thought. Research has shown that
media exposure to violence, death and tragedy contributes to depression and
anxiety, as well as to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). It colors a
negative person’s outlook on life.
That is
why you should limit the amount of news you watch on television and on your
PC. Difficult? Perhaps. But essential if you are to remain positive.
7. They have very thin skin
Those who
are negative are likely to be over sensitive to criticism, even
taking compliments the wrong way. They interpret innocent remarks as being
condescending or rude. For example, a negative person may find jokes about
short people offensive because they are not very tall themselves.
8. They complain a lot
Negative
people tend to whine a lot, convinced that the whole world is against them.
They are usually the victim of lousy weather, a difficult boss, bad luck, and
their upbringing. They rarely step back to look at other factors – such as a
lack of energy, creativity or simply hard work.
9. They never move outside their comfort zone
Moving
outside the familiar world is anathema to those who are negative. They cannot
face the possibility of more fear, discomfort, challenges or failure.
They are thus never able to try out new experiences and are doomed
to dwell in their dull and dreary comfort zone.
10. They love the word ‘but’
A negative
person might say something positive or even compliment you on your great
cooking. They might be happy to find themselves on the beach or in
a restaurant. The only problem: They finish their remarks with the ‘but’
word, turning this positive into a negative. You get remarks like “It looks
like a great restaurant but I wonder why you didn’t book a table outside” or
“It’s a lovely beach but there are always too many people around.”
11. They are underachievers
Lack of
success could be due to many factors, but negativity is a main cause.
Negative people usually think they are not smart enough, athletic enough,
or good enough. But the real threat to their success is that their emotional
intelligence is crippled by their often critical and confrontational manner.
Additionally, they will regale you with stories of how difficult people were,
how they would never collaborate and how impossible it was to get
anywhere with them.
If they
had been just a bit more positive, you think, they might have got somewhere!
12. They never get excited about future projects
Have you
noticed that those who are negative can never talk about future plans or
projects in a positive way? Actually, they rarely talk about plans at all
because they are too wrapped up in their present misery. As a positive
person, you have dreams. You have projects and visions of what your future
will be like. You are on an open highway while they are stuck in a dark
tunnel.
13. They become energy vampires
In
addition to being demanding, negative people suck out all your
energy, just like a vampire. They are simply incapable of producing any
positive energy and will absorb your attention,
time, and energy as they proceed to drag you down the negativity spiral.
14. They miss out on the good things of life
A negative
person will hardly recognize joy, passion, contentment and excitement.
These are not emotions or sensations that they regularly experience.
Of course,
this is hardly surprising when considering these persons are fixated on
their unsatisfying jobs, relationships and social status.
15. They put a negative spin on good news
You are
excited to share great news about your dream job, engagement or a new
house. But when you want to tell a negative person, you hesitate. Why? You know
that they will always find a way to make it sound negative. They will caution
you to be careful, warn you of the dangers and tell you to think carefully
before accepting.
The best
way to deal with all this negativity is to thank your lucky stars that you are
positive and that you have overcome most of the negativity in your life. The
more negative a person is, the happier you can be that you are not
like them – and you will be extra careful about getting caught in their
web.
BY ROBERT LOCKE
http://www.lifehack.org/293018/15-signs-negative-people?ref=mail&mtype=goal_reminder&mid=20161108_with_thumbnail&uid=687414&hash=707e797f7e757e6d794c856d747b7b3a6f7b79&action=read_more&goal_id=25&token=d0e3e4b03809d240b52d71f8a6770fa9
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