Monday, August 6, 2012

COMMUNICATION SPECIAL..Uh’s and Um’s (2)




How to Minimize Um’s and Uh’s When Speaking
While it’s not necessary, and some linguistic experts would say, even desirable, to eliminate all the um’s from your everyday conversations (unless they’re excessive or clustered), you do definitely want to minimize them in more formal settings where the stakes and expectations are higher and your hemming and hawing could be a distraction. Too many um’s and uh’s can irritate your listeners because you’re essentially thinking out loud, and people want to do less thinking when listening to someone and instead be carried along by your words. Constant delays prevent people from getting lost in your rhetoric, and make them think, “Come out with it already!” They also hurt your credibility with the audience because they can make it appear you didn’t respect them enough to prepare adequately and decided to wing it, and/or that you’re not confident in what you’re saying and don’t know your stuff inside and out. Finally, a lot of um’s can signal dishonesty, leading people to think you’re buying time to think of an excuse or alibi. All in all, not the kind of impression you want to make.
Across the population, people use fillers as little as 1.2 times per thousand words up to as many as 88 times per thousand words. If you want to be the guy on the lower end of the scale, here are some tips:
Limit distractions. Remember how an um can represent the junction between planning what to say and executing it? Anything that adds to your cognitive load while you speak increases the need for these pauses, as you’re not just trying to think and speak at the same time, but are also distracted/feeling emotional/working on some other task. The more you can concentrate on just speaking, the less fillers you’ll use.
Don’t put your hands in your pockets. Studies have found that when your arms and hands are constrained, the amount of filler you use goes up, because you’re unable to gesticulate and thus are less confident your message is getting across.
Prepare rigorously. When giving a speech or presentation that can be planned for beforehand, extensive preparation can minimize your use of filler. If the information you wish to convey is fresh in your mind, a filled pause won’t be needed to retrieve it. A couple of points that will be especially helpful here:
  • The less constraints that are placed on what you can speak about, the more likely you are to use fillers. So narrow down your topic, and then narrow it down again.
  • Concentrate on the transitions you’ll make. Transitioning from one topic to another in a speech is a dangerous time for the formation of um’s, because the task adds to your cognitive load. Plan out exactly how you will transition to and from each topic, and write these transitions on an index card you can glance at during your speech.
Tell a story. Um’s and uh’s naturally vanish once you get involved in telling a story. And as a bonus, stories are some of the most persuasive and memorable rhetorical tools you can employ.
Talk face-to-face if you can. The use of fillers goes up when you’re talking on the phone. Because you don’t have body language and facial expressions at your disposal, you struggle more in choosing the right words to convey what you mean.
Try to relax and be less self-conscious. Um-ers tend to describe themselves as “unusually self-conscious” and apt to “worry quite a bit over possible misfortunes” and thus unsurprisingly speak more slowly, carefully planning and crafting what they are going to say. Instead of concentrating on what people are thinking about you (and this advice works for a lot of things, folks) focus on totally getting into what you’re doing. Instead of pausing, just keep charging ahead, talking a little faster than you normally do and letting your sentences roll together. You’ll choose the wrong word more often and have to restart your sentences more frequently, but stylistically, the audience will find your speech more fluid, engaging, and forward-moving.
If you need help lowering your inhibitions, researchers have found that after 19 beers, the average person stops saying “um” and “uh.” They also stop saying many other words that are comprehensible, of course.
Keep your sentences simple and short. The longer the sentence, the more likely you are to fall into filler. And shorter sentences make you sound clearer and more forceful, confident, and manly to boot. To keep your sentences simple and short:
  • Use more simple declarative sentences. Subject. Predicate. Period. Drop the unnecessary clauses and conjunctions and get right to the point. Take it from E.B. White: “There isn’t any thought or idea that can’t be expressed in a fairly simple declarative sentence, or in a series of fairly simple declarative sentences.”
  • Get rid of other fillers such as: “sort of,” “like,” “ya know,” “okay,” “right,” “so,” “well,” “stuff like that,” “kind of,” and “I mean.” If it’s extraneous to the meaning of the sentence, leave it out.
  • Use less hedge words and phrases, such as “hopefully,” “probably,” “possibly,” “quite,” “relatively,” “reasonably” and “fairly,” and don’t say things like, “I was just wondering…” “I was thinking…” “I don’t know but…”
Hedge words and fillers are often used to weaken and soften a sentence when someone is afraid they might be wrong and/or want to tread lightly.  They sometimes can be helpful when you’re trying to be diplomatic (and are useful in emails when you only have words to convey meaning), but many times it’s better to plainly put your idea out there and be assertive.
Now a Note on What Not to Do
You may have heard that the best way to get rid of your um’s and uh’s is to replace them with a silent pause. This is public speaking dogma; you’ll find it in practically every public speaking book out there. And it certainly makes sense on the face of it. A silent pause sounds dignified and noble while an um sounds uncertain, right?
Wrong, as it turns out.
In a study done with college students, the students were first asked about their perception of people who frequently say “um” and “uh.” Not surprisingly given the cultural bias against ummm-ing, the students rated um-ers as “uncomfortable, inarticulate, uninteresting, ill-prepared, nervous, disfluent, unattractive, monotonous, unsophisticated, and lacking in confidence.” Ouch!
The students were then asked to listen to three different edits of a recording of a man’s call-in commentary on a radio show. In one version, the man’s um’s were left in. In another, the man’s um’s were replaced with silent pauses. In the third version, the pauses were removed altogether so that the man’s words flowed together.
The result? The version without any pauses at all was rated the best. But the verison with silent pauses was not ranked any higher on quality than the version with the um’s; the silent pauses did not improve people’s perception of the speaker’s eloquence. And, in fact, the man in the version with the silent pauses was rated has having more anxiety than the man who um-ed.
Bottom line: Minimizing all unplanned pauses (a purposeful dramatic pause can be an effective rhetorical tool) can boost your eloquence. But don’t worry about trying to replace your um’s with silent pauses; it doesn’t improve your speech, not to mention the fact that the stress from the effort may make you sound worse than just relaxing and letting a few um’s sneak in there.
Take Heart Ye Um-ers: A Final Tip
Even if none of the um-minimizing techniques mentioned above are able to help you keep your ummm-ing in check, there’s still something you can do to come off as well-spoken to others: concentrate on always making the content of what you say outstanding.
In the study just described, the students were broken into three groups before they listened to the recordings. One group was told to only focus on the content of the recording. Another was told to only focus on the style. And the third was given no instructions (the control).
When listening to the recording in which the um’s had been retained, those who paid attention just to the style of the man’s speech noticed them, while those who focused on the content largely filtered them out.
And now we get to the crux of the stigma that surrounds um-laden speech. If you find yourself noticing um’s as someone speaks, chances are it’s because you’re focusing on the speaker’s style instead on his content, and the reason you’re doing that is because the content isn’t very interesting and worthy of attention. As the author of the study concluded: “Um’s will not be associated with poor speech, but noting ums will be…Just about every speaker produces um’s, but the good speakers, by keeping substance, not style, the center of attention, will effectively hide their hesitancies.”
Brett & Kate McKay
http://artofmanliness.com/2012/06/14/becoming-well-spoken-how-to-minimize-your-uhs-and-ums/

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