PERSONAL SPECIAL... CURBING THE RAGE ATTACK

CURBING THE RAGE ATTACK

If you are angry at work, don’t pretend like everything is okay. Follow these simple techniques and cool off

When it comes to negative emotions like sadness, anxiety, or anger, one common course of action is to try ignoring them. But Deanna Geddes, a professor at Temple University’s Fox School of Business, recommends the opposite. “Anger is a healthy emotion. It signals that something is upsetting us. When we feel anger, it’s helpful to stop and think about what’s really making us angry,” Geddes says. Anger forces action. It can help you change a situation for the better — but there’s a right and a wrong way to deal with being ticked off. 

Here are five steps to processing your anger and changing a work situation that’s infuriating you:

Remove yourself from the situation

If you feel yourself starting to get annoyed, remove yourself from the situation to calm down. To exit gracefully, Geddes recommends saying the following. “I’m feeling some anger about (insert situation here). Give me a few minutes to cool down a bit, but then let’s talk about this because it’s important to resolve.” It might seem awkward, but it’s better than adding more fuel to the fire and pushing you to explode.

Distract yourself

The problem with anger is that it fires up the emotion centres of the brain, making it challenging to be logical, says Emma Seppälä, the science director of Stanford University’s Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education. So, while it’s okay to be angry, you will need to calm down a little bit before you can address the situation that’s frustrating you. Breathe, take a walk, distract yourself with a funny movie, meditate, exercise, pray— anything to help you regain your composure but also some perspective. If you don’t have time for any of that, try taking deep breaths. Then, revisit the situation when you are calmer.

De-escalate your thinking

Reframing your thoughts is an important way to get to a logical conclusion. Angry thoughts can often be very exaggerated and overly dramatic. For instance, angry thoughts often capitalise on something ‘never working’ or ‘always going wrong’. That’s almost definitely untrue — few people are consistently awful, and few things are always awry.

Reframe your perspective towards people

When it comes to your co-worker who may be ticking you off, Seppälä said to understand that they’re probably not out to get you. They likely have no clue that they’re making you furious. “Most of us don’t run around with evil intentions — but many of us do make mistakes and hurt or anger others accidentally,” Seppälä says. Chances are, the person you are angry with is not purposefully trying to hurt you.

For instance, your micro-managing boss is probably following the protocol and not ticking you off because you are that clueless person who needs constant handholding. And your super-competitive co-worker who always steals your ideas might not even realise what he is doing.

Try to understand the other person

When you make room for another person’s point of view and ask ‘why’ instead of immediately assuming the worst, you develop a deeper understanding.

businessinsider.in

ET 7AUG18