7 Key Qualities of an Effective Mentor
Whether
it was your boss at your first job, a professor during your college
career, or a family friend, many people will find someone to act as
his or her mentor. This person provides advice and helps navigate
the trials and tribulations of starting a career. And now, it's
your turn.
The
desire to succeed can be overwhelming. It keeps people awake at
night, drives them to arrive at the office early, and stay late on
Fridays. However, there is one common, major problem that derails
many entrepreneurs and professionals with high aspirations: dealing
with new and challenging obstacles. Despite the most earnest effort
and best intentions, most people need help when faced with such
challenges.
Whether
it was your boss at your first job, a professor during your college
career, or a family friend, many people will find someone to act as
his or her mentor. This person provides advice and helps navigate the
trials and tribulations of starting a career.
And
now, it's your turn.
But
where do you start?
Mentoring
often begins in an educational environment with a fellow student who
is further along in the same program (a "peer advocate") or
between an instructor and a student. Mentorships can also be
community-based, part of a church group or other organization
designed to offer professional advice and guidance to those who've
expressed an interest. Equally effective may be a
managerial/subordinate pairing in either the same or different
departments. But, depending on the goals of the mentoring
relationship, the mentor and mentee don't have to be in the same
industry.
Mentor
pairings can be sought out through an established program or
independently, and one-on-one meetings should take place on a
consistent basis.
A
mentor/mentee pairing requires work, commitment, and follow-through
on both sides if it's going to succeed. So, what aptitudes should
you demonstrate to make sure that the mentoring you offer is
effective and has lasting value?
Consider
these seven key qualities that can help you become an effective
mentor.
1.
Ability and willingness to communicate what you know.
It
goes without saying that as a mentor, you're regarded as an expert
in your field or area of responsibility. But it's one thing to know
what you're doing; it's entirely another to be able to clearly
explain what you know--and to be willing to take the time to do it.
Forget the jargon, the acronyms, and the buzzwords. Being clear
when you communicate the lessons you've learned, or the strategies
or guidance you're offering, is essential, as is your level of
desire to communicate the intricate details in a way that makes
sense and that your mentee can understand and learn from.
2.
Preparedness
Being
a mentor means making an important, serious commitment to someone,
so give the process--and your mentee --the respect he or she
deserves. Show your faith in your mentee's abilities and in the
process by preparing for each mentoring session. This isn't a
stream-of-consciousness deal or a "go-ahead-and-pick-my-brain"
process. Yes, it's important for your mentee to actively
participate and even take the lead in these sessions. But you
should ask your mentee what topics or subjects he or she wants to
talk about beforehand, and once you know, you should outline the
key points you want to focus on ahead of time, and have a plan
ready for imparting your details in an effective and expedient way.
3.
Approachability, availability, and the ability to listen
Your
mentee must feel comfortable approaching you for advice or
consultation; however, he or she must keep your availability and
your schedule in mind. So, it's good policy to establish a set day
and time for regular sessions or meetings. In this
hurry-up-and-make-it-happen world, it's important to be prepared
and make the most of the time you've got with your mentee. You owe
that to him or her, to the process, and to yourself. And once these
time parameters are established, you must keep your commitments
wholeheartedly and be ready to listen well and with an open
mind, along with providing counsel and advice.
4.
Honesty with diplomacy
Any
questions that aren't addressed can lead to concerns and problems,
so you owe it to your mentee to be candid and straightforward with
him or her. Dispense with formalities and really help to facilitate
an open, even lively dialogue--a give-and-take--and don't beat
around the bush in offering your constructive feedback, good and
bad. Say what you think your mentee needs to
hear from you, not what you think he or she might want to
hear. Be willing to debate and discuss in a tactful way. Provide
useful, honest guidance while ensuring that your mentee takes the
reins and makes his or her own decisions as to next steps or the
best course of action.
5.
Inquisitiveness
Being
a mentor also means you should continue learning about what's going
on in your industry or business, your school, your community, or
the world at large. Remember: What worked a decade ago may not be
optimal today, and what works today may not work as well one, two,
five, or more years from now. So, continual learning is essential
if you plan to continue to be an effective mentor. Always keep an
alert eye on trends, topics, and developments that may impact you
or your role, both now and in the future. And if your mentee asks
you something you don't know the answer to, do yourself and your
mentee a favor and follow up to find the answer.
6.
Objectivity and fairness
Remember
that a mentoring relationship differs from a friendship. Yes, you
like your mentee and care about seeing him or her succeed, but that
doesn't mean you have to socialize with your mentee or follow or
friend him or her on social websites like Twitter and Facebook.
LinkedIn, specifically designed for business networking, may be a
more appropriate connection to establish with your mentee. Also,
ensure that there's no hidden agenda or ulterior motives involved
in this relationship. Outside of the mentor/mentee relationship,
you don't owe your mentee any favors, and he or she doesn't owe you
anything except his or her thanks. Equally, others who know you and
your mentee don't owe either of you anything. You can be an
advocate for your mentee while still retaining your objectivity and
fairness and not unfairly influencing any process either of you may
be involved in.
7.
Compassion and genuineness
Just
because you must maintain your objectivity and fairness doesn't
mean you can't show your compassion. In fact, your mentoring
relationship probably won't work if you don't show your interest
and desire to provide one-on-one help and guidance. You must also
be selfless about sharing what you know. Keeping your goal in
mind--to remain worthy of someone's trust, model positive behavior
and successful performance, and offer guidance and advice toward
reaching a specific goal--should be the compass that guides all
your actions as a mentor.
If
you want to become a mentor and you belong to any groups or
organizations, inquire as to whether they have a mentoring
program. You may
even learn a thing or two from the experience.
JAYSON
DEMERS@http://www.inc.com/jayson-demers/7-key-qualities-of-an-effective-mentor.html?cid=em01014week40c
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