In Case You Wonder Why Your Coworker
Is Doing Better Than You...
Have you ever heard the expression
"Bloom where you're planted?" I used to believe that until I actually
tried gardening.
Last year I ordered some plants
and flowers that looked like the good stuff my neighbors had growing in their
yards. I glossed over the little details the catalog included in the
description about what Zone they thrive in, or what kind of light
they needed, or what kind of maintenance would be required. I just knew I
wanted those plants, in these specific places in my yard. I
figured if my neighbors could grow those types of plants in their
yards, I shouldn't have any trouble growing them in my own.
So, no surprise to anybody who has
successfully grown plants before, mine didn't fare too well. Apparently,
the whole "full sun" versus "shade" is a real thing. And
when they say to make holes for the bulbs 6-8 inches under ground, if you
decide that 3-4 inches will have to do since the ground was harder
than you anticipated, it doesn't really work out. And then all that talk
about when to fertilize them during the year and with what? I told myself that
was just a ploy to make money for lawn care companies. Who's got time for that
anyway? Apparently my neighbors do, because they know how to nurture great
looking, healthy plants. None of my plants thrived except one, which I
somehow actually planted exactly where and how it was supposed to be
done. It was humbling to realize what a fool I was for believing I
could get superior results while willfully ignoring the many
elements necessary to cultivate each plant.
Our careers are actually
no different. If we pay attention to what we personally,
specifically require to thrive and make that
non-negotiable we're going to get the best results we can
personally achieve, with a lot less stress, worry and frustration. And yet
how many of us have chosen a suboptimal set of circumstances for
ourselves from the get go, and let it suck the life out out us
while we berate ourselves for not doing as well as those around us?
Your coworker is
probably doing better than you because she is more suited to
her job than you are.
1) Start
with what you value.
Not what you "should"
value, not what sounds good, but what you really, actually love and care about.
What inspires and motivates you to keep going everyday? What would you fight
for? Whittle the list down to a top five (p.s. this is hard!), and ask
yourself: is the job I do, the place I work, the people
I work with more in alignment with my highest values, or in opposition to
them?
2) Know what your
intrinsic talents are.
I'm not talking about your Microsoft
Word skills and the stuff you put on your resume. The question is what do you
do better than most people without even thinking about it? Be careful, because
these are generally things that come so natural to you, you take for granted
how much they make you stand out. For instance, do people always tell you that
you're funny? Or easy to talk to? Or a natural leader? This is a sure sign
you've got something others can see, but that you may discount. Think about the
things that you've always been complimented on and also think about your
idiosyncrasies - those things you cannot NOT do, even when it gets you in
"trouble". For better and for worse, these things are a part of who
you are. Finding an environment where these defining personal traits are
valued makes it much easier for you shine than in a place where you feel
embarrassed or uncomfortable being who you really are.
3) Analyze your
"style".
Here is where self-assessments are
really helpful. There are so many out there, but things like a StrengthsFinder
or the Myers-Briggs Inventory or the Kolbe Conative style inventories are
places to start. If you've been in corporate for some time, chances are you've
been at a company event/meeting where you were given some sort of "work
style" or personality inventory. This isn't rocket science - you
answer questions about yourself and then they give you summary of what you're
like. But what comes out of these is a very organized, focused way to analyze
what you're good at, how you like to work and make decisions, and what your
potential blind spots are. Pay attention to these and find an environment where
you'll "fit in" given who are. For instance, if you're an extrovert,
you might thrive in an office environment rather than one where you work
virtually from home, whereas an introvert would likely prefer the virtual environment.
4) Figure out what
energizes you, and what debilitates.
Building a career where
your day to day work actually gives you energy instead of depleting it is
critical to finding work situations you can be successful in. So if
you find that giving presentations fills you with excited energy and
sitting in meetings make you feel like someone put valium in your
coffee, then by all means, you need to find a way to give more
presentations and go to fewer meetings! It is the things we think are little -
a meeting here, a presentation there - that actually compound very quickly to
either feeling energized and at your best, or depleted, anxious and
exhausted.
5) Think about your
legacy.
What do you want to be true
about yourself before you leave this life? If you had a front row seat at
your own funeral, what things would people say about you that you were proud
of? Do work that lets you be that person. It doesn't mean that your job
has to be your legacy - it just means that if you decide who you want
to be in this world, then you can build a career that allows you to be that
person. If you want to be remembered as a giving person,
avoid environments where you're rewarded for withholding praise,
information, or rewards from others. If you want to be remembered as a
family-oriented person, do work for an organization that values your
love of family by encouraging you to stay connected to them, physically and
emotionally.
Once you build a clear map for
yourself of who you are now, who you wish to be and what things help you get
there, you will be an expert at finding a fertile ground on which to build your
career. Nobody in this world can "bloom" in every situation.
Hard work and positive thinking are powerful factors, but they alone won't determine
success. The trick is to take the time to know yourself well
enough to choose people, situations and environments that nurture and encourage
your growth organically, so that achieving all that you hope for becomes
your reality instead of your pipe dream.
Theresa Sullivan
No comments:
Post a Comment