BOSS SPECIAL................. STAND UP TO WHINERS

 STAND UP TO WHINERS 

A smart five-step plan to successfully work in the midst of blamers

    If you work with someone who thinks the boss is a jerk, the temperature is always ‘below freezing point’, the canteen meal ‘drips of oil’, and the lobby ‘reeks of pee’, you have a whiner in your midst. Even if you didn’t think it, there is a difference, say psychologists between complainers and whiners. When complaining becomes consistent, and the blamer fails to show any signs of trying to find a solution, toxicity lurks around you. The side effects: loss of morale, build up of negativity, and drop in productivity (just sitting next to a whiner at work can derail learning, judgment, memory and attention, says recent research). In short, work stops being fun around sour candies. It’s not for nothing that fancy firms are hiring Chief Happiness Officers.

    Interestingly, whining is becoming so common, most grumblers don’t realise they are doing anything wrong or how detrimental it is for others to bear. Practically every office has one of them, and since we can’t wish them away, experts have developed a few smart strategies to help those around deal with the morale-crushers.

STAY AWAY

Misery loves company. So, the best possible solution (although not always feasible) is to keep your distance from the whiner, avoid them altogether. When they realise you aren’t one of them, they may not bring it up again.

MAKE A NOTE OF WHAT HASN’T WORKED

There are some strategies that always fall flat. Cheering up a whiner? No. You aren’t taking their problem seriously. Complaining about the complainer? No, that makes you a complainer yourself. Complaining with them? No, that will only lead to bonding. Suggesting a quick fix? No, their problems can’t be fixed by smart a** tricks. Say, “It must be really tough on you. I don’t know how you do it.” It’s likely that they may get back with, “It’s not that bad.” That you have offered empathy, not sympathy or solutions, helps.

DEFLECT ATTENTION

It’s possible that the grumbler next to you is an attention seeker. So, nodding along may not always help. In fact, it could backfire, with the grumbler collecting a crowd at the water cooler to narrate how you were the one spouting gossip about the HOD. Don’t ignore or play neutral. Give the stress head a different kind of attention. It’s effective, say experts. “Does anything go well for you? ask him/her. It’s likely that you are going to get a silent stare or change of topic. Either way, you are safe.

PUT THEM ON THE SPOT

It’s possible that the complaint may be a legitimate one. Put the ball back in the whiner’s court by asking for suggestions. Say, “I agree. So, how do you think we can find a solution to this issue?” This will reflect our faith in their ability to come up with imaginative solutions. Suggest that they address those bits that can be fixed immediately, and provide assistance when needed.

AND, OUR FAVOURITE: ANNOUNCE A REWARD

Nothing works like a bribe. Pace Butler, the CEO of one of America’s largest cell phone recycling companies, offered a cash prize to any employee who could stay away from complaining for a week at a stretch. Volunteers kept track of their behaviour by wearing a wristband. Each time they slipped, they moved it to the other wrist.

    Try it, bosses.

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