Six
Words And Phrases That Make Everyone Hate Working With You
Some of the most common expressions carry subtle undertones of
resentment when you use them around the office.
In general, it’s smart to say what you mean.
In the workplace, people tend to use overwrought business jargon
to compensate for not knowing their stuff. But
there’s a less-apparent risk to doing just the reverse. If you sound like a walking
Instagram comment, you might start to alienate yourself in your own office and
lose your coworkers’ trust—even if they use those same kinds
of words expressions when they’re texting their roommates.
Some terms and phrases are best left to casual exchanges with
friends and family. Here are a few you probably shouldn’t let creep into your
office vocabulary.
1. “NO PROBLEM”
I know—what could possibly be wrong with this one? It’s so
innocuous, right? You’re asked to photocopy a document or put together a
meeting agenda. Easy enough. “No problem,” you reply.
The expression comes up in all kinds of business environments, and
the tone is often chipper and upbeat, so you don’t give a second thought
to using it periodically. Few people who hear “no problem” take it literally,
but at a level just beneath consciousness awareness, it telegraphs an
underhanded resentment. The speaker implies the possibility that somebody has
created an issue that they’re willing to let slide.
It’s not the (nearly absurd) risk of a literal misinterpretation
that you should guard against, though. It’s the likelihood that you’ll
default to “no problem” when presented with tasks you consider menial—giving
directions, taking minutes, photocopying, wrapping a package, or stepping out
of someone’s way in an elevator—and unconsciously show your annoyance with them (including nonverbally).
Chances are you won’t say “no problem” when
your supervisor asks you to prepare an important report or assigns you
some other significant task. When a work duty carries more weight, you’re more
likely to ask smart questions about what it’ll take to do it right, convey your
enthusiasm, and declare that you’re up to the task. But shouldn’t you try
to be seen as the person who approaches all that work that way? Scrap “no
problem”—it isn’t helping you show your best side. (And after all, it’s a
double negative.)
2. “WHATEVER”
Like “no problem,” this word usually has a flippant tone to
it, but that’s not the main downside to using it. “Whatever” is often used to
dismiss another person’s idea. If I say,
“Sure, whatever!” after somebody has offered a suggestion, I might think I’m
just saying I don’t mind one way or the other—kind of like, “doesn’t matter to
me, go for it!” But it won’t always come across that supportively.
Instead, it might signal that I disagree but will go along
with it anyway—maybe because I don’t have the power or the initiative to
convince my colleagues otherwise, or maybe just because I’ve got a martyr
complex. “Whatever” denotes resentful resignation, even if it doesn’t
sound that way to your own ears. Much the same is true of other
tepid notes of assent, like “yeah,” “yup,” “sure,” and “fine.” Use
these words with your friends, but not in professional settings where the
stakes are fundamentally different.
3. “IT IS WHAT IT IS”
Clichés like this make you sound like a lazy thinker. We default
unthinkingly to empty expressions when we’re trying to give the impression we
have something to say but really don’t, and also when we want to sound as
though we’re comfortable with something but might not be. “Business is
business,” “it is what it is,” and phrases like them aren’t just meaningless
and repetitious—they sound like you don’t really care or that your brain just
isn’t in gear.
4. “PISSED OFF”
This expression is heard around the office more commonly than
you might think, and even when the speaker is referring to how somebody
else is feeling, it still reflects badly on them. Saying “I’m pissed off
that I didn’t get that vacation time” makes you sound angry
and uncooperative—that much is obvious. But if you say “she was
really pissed off after that meeting,” referring to your boss, you’re subtly
expressing a criticism of her (even if you think she had ever right to be
furious!). Likewise, if you remark, “I think I pissed off Doug yesterday,”
you’re basically confessing that you can’t get along with others.
From just about every angle, this expression
doesn’t work in your favor. Yes, people in your office—including you—are
going to get upset from time to time. That much is natural. But how you speak
about those breakdowns in collaboration should be more, well, collaborative. That goes for email, too, by the way.
5. “CAN’T”
To be fair, you can’t get away with never saying “can’t”—it’s just
too common and useful a contraction—and I’m not suggesting you try. But
it is smart to be on you guard for the contexts where you use
it.
For example, you might innocently say at a meeting, “I can’t get
that report to you until next Monday.” And fine, maybe you really can’t because
it just isn’t feasible. But phrasing it like this makes you sound
ineffective—like the person who disappoints. Why not flip it around and
say what you can do instead? “I’ll have that report to
you next Monday.” There—suddenly you’re somebody who delivers, and is
helpfully realistic about timelines to boot.
Try to avoid “don’t” in similar situations. Rather than saying, “I
don’t know what the solution is,” go with, “Let’s go over what
some possible solutions might look like—I could really use some
input.” Then you’ll sound bright and collegial.
6. “HOPE”
Here’s another perfectly innocuous word that can sound defeatist
and passive (or even passive aggressive) around the
office if you aren’t careful. In some contexts, it can make you sound less than
confident. For example, if you say, “I hope we’ll
meet our sales target,” you’re really planting the opposite idea—the
possibility that you may not. Obviously, that possibility is real and may
even be one that you want to impress upon your team in order so they know what
the stakes are. But then why not just say, “I really want us to meet our sales
target, and I know we can get there”?
Similarly, “I hope our team can agree on a plan” sounds like you
don’t exactly see how you’ll manage to. Instead, just say, “We expect to
hammer out a plan” or “we’re committed to coming up with something everybody
agrees on.” Even if you might not actually be confident
that’ll happen, you should probably refrain from showing it.
No matter what, people invariably draw impressions of us
based on the words we say. And by the very nature of language, those infinite
shades of interpretation are impossible to control. But it’s still
possible to avoid the expressions that may impart resentment, resignation, or a
lack of commitment that you might not even actually feel. Avoid these six words
and phrases and you’ll start to sound just a little more collegial
and confident. In the workplace especially, a little often goes a long way.
BY JUDITH HUMPHREY ttps://www.fastcompany.com/40441775/six-words-and-phrases-that-make-everyone-hate-working-with-you?u
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