Networking is like brushing your teeth: Does it feel natural or enjoyable? Not really. Is it enough, however, to brush only when a toothache occurs? Regrettably, no. In the same way, networking requires constant and careful attention for a prolonged period of time.
In their new report, ‘Creating and Nurturing Your Social Network: The Art of Building Longterm Mutually Beneficial Relationships’, Fabrizio Ferraro and Conor Neill of the Instituto de Estudios Superiores de la Empresa at the University of Navarra in Spain discuss what networking is.
They suggest that the familiar scramble for assistance when something urgent is needed — a job, some advice or a charitable donation — is not actually networking, but rather part of the ‘sales’ process.
Most real networking relationships will be developed long before you actually need them.
Networking does not come naturally to most people. A bountiful garden is not created overnight. The plants are selected with careful deliberation and nurtured through time. Unwanted weeds are slowly identified and removed.
Begin with communication. Ask lots of questions of the people you meet, and show an interest in their passions. Simple requests for advice or contact suggestions make it easy for others to help you. You need to make a deposit in the relationship bank before asking for a large withdrawal.
Continue with appreciation. Always let people know you appreciate their help. A written thankyou note or a thoughtful act stands out in a world in which email reigns supreme.
Don’t forget to inventory. It doesn’t hurt to make a list every now and then. Who do you know? Even more important, who do you want to know? Here are some practical considerations to help you master the art of building long-term, mutually beneficial relationships:
INTERDEPENDENCE
Our teamwork ability and relationship-management skills are every bit as important as the projects we undertake. It pays to acknowledge the value of the networking process and make space for it.
PERSEVERANCE
Good things take time, and you have to kiss a lot of frogs to find a prince. Start building your network long before you need it.
RECIPROCITY
It often begins with a compliment about a presentation or project. If you offer someone help, be sure to follow through. Trust and reputation depend on reliability.
SIMILARITY
While it’s easier to befriend people who are like you, it’s always possible to find some middle ground with others, no matter how different they may appear at first. Step outside your comfort zone and learn from people with diverse backgrounds, objectives and incentives. Bill Gates once said in an interview that he prefers to read an entire magazine, not only the parts that interest him. That way, he always learns something new.
PROXIMITY
Most social relationships are born out of proximity. However, proximity won’t help if you don’t try to get actively involved in relationship.
CONNECTIONS
Successful leaders influence contacts from one network to another. Think about the people in your contact list. Who needs attention? Who is owed favours or needs your help? You can begin thinking of your network as a lifetime journey.
SOCIABILITY
Find venues and situations in which you actually enjoy networking, rather than forcing yourself to schmooze in uncomfortable settings.
(New York Times ET 31J0112)
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